Child kills mother after arguing over chores

[Jayne]

12 year old boy found guilty after murdering his mother after argument over chores

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,475584,00.html


"They" say the juvenile system will rehabilitate him and he'll be out by the time he's 18. Wow...the mother "yelled at him and slapped him"...then a psychologist claims physical and verbal abuse so he was tried as a juvenile. I guess there must have been physical proof of some physical abuse..not just the Kid's words (and lord, knows kids can exaggerate..a smack on the arm or the cheek can be interpreted into a beating by a kid)..there has to be more to it..What happened to that "wash your mouth out with a bar of soap" some of us used to be "threatened with"? If a parent did that today...that would be child abuse, wouldn't it?

Maybe it's true..maybe the "physical and verbal" abuse rose to such a level, but it seems to what I read in the report, the boy say his mother was yelling at him and slapped him..then he lay in wait for her to return home (after she left after the "chores" argument) and takes a gun and shoots her eight times, then hands it to the live in boyfriend (of ten years, who Taught him How To Shoot..for self defense, etc.)..after emptying the gun. Why didn't the kid call 911? Why didn't he tell the boyfriend, instead of taking the gun and killing his mother..8 shots!

What is up with this kind of "stuff/violence"? This mother have been terribly abusive - I don't know, but it scares me, frankly...I think there is a tremendous amount of "parent abuse" going on these days by the kids in our country and parents have become..many of them...dis-empowered to do anything about it. If you "yell" at your kid, they either threaten to call 911 or report it to a school administrator. Forbid if one ever "slaps/spanks" their child. Oh, I'm not advocating beating or psychological verbal abuse (as in demeaning and destructive verbal attacks) - seen enough of that and would be right up there agreeing that it is wrong and needs intervention, but never as an "excuse" for murder...yet understandable, in a sense, if it is eggregious. But a child to become violent over arguing about Chores?

Maybe more will come out of this to find out the mother beat her child..locked him in closets..didn't feed him..that his chores were Way Beyond his Abilities? I have no idea. But this sickens me..and the boyfriend "witnessed it"? What was he doing? watching? trying to do nothing to stop it?

The report says the boy handed the gun to the boyfriend...so I'd guess there are prints from both of them on it? I wonder. No murder (unless self defense, imo) is justifiable..did the boy take the "rap" for the boyfriend? But the court decided..so I guess those thoughts are "moot" and perhaps ridiculous.

Without knowing more..than the report.."argument over chores" and a "slap", this is a travesty of justice, imo. Perhaps that psychological profile was "spot on" and showed consistent abuse..just horrible things happening..that once this child was told "do this or else"..he just lost it.

That said...ad nauseam, I feel sorry for this boy, in the sense that ..well..did he really know what he was doing? I do think so. Did he care...I'd bet you he does...now. I feel sorry for that "dead" mother..if things were that bad in that household..someone should have intervened. I do not feel sorry for the boyfriend, although perhaps I should.

jmo

j

[bkwits]

After reading the Fox news article, it sure sounds like their was tremendous abuse by the mom, both mental and physical. IMO

[Amy]

I would certainly wonder what the boyfriend was doing during the shooting, if he was there for the boy to hand him the gun when it was empty. Weird.

When my DD was defiant, I told her we had several choices. She could do as she was told. I could beat the holy crap out of her, and go to jail, and they would go to foster care. Or, we could call SRS right then to take her, and she wouldn't get hurt, and I wouldn't go to jail. She always ended up doing as told. Son did NOT like the talk about foster care, so he usually did as told.

[Jayne]

Originally Posted by grammybear

I just do not know. It seems like this boy had an awful lot of anger to deal with. If the mom was abusing him why didn't someone intervene. I am not saying the mom didn't abuse him. Who is to know. The other thing to bother me is that the boyfriend was in the home at the time and took hold of the gun once the shooting was done.
There are so many things that we do not know about, but I can tell you abuse of any kind should not be allowed.

I know there were times with my girls that I wanted to slap the heck out of them, but it did not happen.
I remember when my middle child was 15 she started an argument with me and tried to tell me what I should do. That the was first and last time she ever pulled that. She was more afraid of her father and what he would do to her then she was to me.

My husband and I are not big believers of abuse but there are times you somehow need to get through to your kids, especially during the teenage years.
But I do not believe a swatt to the butt or slapping something that might hurt them is abuse. But I would always try to use other forms of discipline before restorting to a swatt or slap. I know that kids are not afraid or respectful of their parents. I think a lot of that comes from a parents getting in trouble for trying to discipline their kids. I believe that the judicial system makes it real easy to take away kids and that is not the way it should be.
There are many kids who use the line of I am going to call the cops on you if you punish me.

A couple of my grandchildren told me that once and I told them go ahead, I will willingly go tojail for making you mind. That was the end of that conversation. My daughter tell their or has told their kids I brought you into the world and I can take you out. That has put the brakes on their threats after that conversation.

Sorry for the long rant, but it seems as though kids do not respect authority of anykind and there are so many people making excuses for these behaviors.

jmoo

You are so smart...I really respect your input..

Jayne

[Details]

12 years old - he should never have had access to a gun. Like in other child cases - the brain is NOT developed yet, they do not have the capability to make reasoned choices that they understand, they do not have full control over their emotions, temper, and actions.

Abuse, of course, makes it worse - gives them a horrible example, feeds their temper, while never teaching them (by example) to control it. Abused kids tend to have lots of problems even as adults from the abuse.

This isn't about discipline - no amount of discipline turns a 12 year old brain into an 18 year old brain. There's just good reason we don't let them decide for themselves at this age, what they will do. 12 - they're starting to become who they will be as adults, but even the most exceptional have a ton of growing and changing to do, may still have the occasional tantrum where they'd do or say anything to get their way.