Foster care

[Freebird]

Something these kids need to see...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pu4nl...eature=related

[Freebird]

Originally posted by Aame [*]My prayer is that these kids don't have to suffer the same conditions we've heard of other children having to endure in the foster care system.

God Bless the child [/*]

And especially when most of these kids were not even abused on the ranch and may have been taken cause of a hoax.

I wouldn't put it past CPS to sweep any abuse by the foster parents under the rug.

[lotty]

Originally posted by stptheracket [*]Okay I have sat and read some of you post about the big bad foster care folks. I am a foster parent and a mother of two children adopted out of child protective services. CPS worked with the mother, bent over backwards to try to get her to understand that she had to Take care of her kids. People that loose their kids to CPS always want to make it sound like it was not their fault, cps was picking on them or the kid was some how at fault. I never had a child in my care that was not 100% safer with me than with their parent. So if you had a bad experience then I am sorry for you. But don't blame the people that step up and take care of the children that their own flesh and blood can not or will not protect. [/*]

To the silent and unsung heros. Foster Parents deal with a lot. I've seen it with my own eyes. Big hearts. To you stptheracket BTW love your user name.

[Poochie Pie]

Originally posted by stptheracket [*]Okay I have sat and read some of you post about the big bad foster care folks. I am a foster parent and a mother of two children adopted out of child protective services. CPS worked with the mother, bent over backwards to try to get her to understand that she had to Take care of her kids. People that loose their kids to CPS always want to make it sound like it was not their fault, cps was picking on them or the kid was some how at fault. I never had a child in my care that was not 100% safer with me than with their parent. So if you had a bad experience then I am sorry for you. But don't blame the people that step up and take care of the children that their own flesh and blood can not or will not protect. [/*]

Poochie

[Details]

Originally posted by stptheracket [*]Okay I have sat and read some of you post about the big bad foster care folks. I am a foster parent and a mother of two children adopted out of child protective services. CPS worked with the mother, bent over backwards to try to get her to understand that she had to Take care of her kids. People that loose their kids to CPS always want to make it sound like it was not their fault, cps was picking on them or the kid was some how at fault. I never had a child in my care that was not 100% safer with me than with their parent. So if you had a bad experience then I am sorry for you. But don't blame the people that step up and take care of the children that their own flesh and blood can not or will not protect. [/*]

Nicely said! When you have the story from the parents, you almost never have the wholse story. They leave out the bits that make themselves seem bad.

And the poor kids - they need love so bad, they'll love their abuser, believe in them. because we all need someone to love.

[Carol25]

I taught in the inner city where many children were abused or neglected and I had at least one rape victim each year. They absolutley loved coming to school, and so did I! I was lucky enough to have "at risk" students" and had about 12-15 students for a half day (2 classes a day). We were like family. There was just so much love in that room and caring for others, congratulating each other for their accomplishments, it was just so much fun!

I was so amazed at how resilient they were. I knew of their backgrounds, whose mom or dad was in jail, whose mom (prostitute) was never home when they woke up each morning, but the 6 yr. old twins got themselves to school each day! There was never a shortage of hugs and great smiles.

These babies will be fine. Just get them away from their environment and let them feel real love. They will blossom and what a delight it will be!

[spageddy]

We usually only hear about the rotten foster parents. There are lots more wonderful foster parents than there are rotten ones. (JMO)In any case, I think that the care of these particular children will be closely monitored. Again, JMO, but one would surmise that with all the media attention focused on this case, that the state would be very careful with how these children are cared for.

[KatyDid]

Originally posted by Texanne [*]I was married to a man who was brought up in an orphanage. The plus was that his siblings were there where he saw them fairly often (they were older and in another building). There is always a part missing in these kids. However, the alternative was not acceptable. His father died, and his mother was left very poor and had to work for low wages. Everyone one of those kids are fairly successful people. They are still close, have family reunions,....and attend the reunion of kids from "the home". Society does not cause these children to be in bad situations.....most of the time the parents cause it themselves. Put the blame for all the horrible situations the kids are in square where it belongs...on the back of people having children they will not, or are ill-equipped to care for.

I hear a lot of blame on the foster care system. Where are the solutions? If you blame, then you should at least suggest a solution.

The most heartbreaking story I have ever heard my ex tell was when he and another boy (both abt. 11 yrs old) ran away from the home and walked and hitchhiked over 30 miles to where his mother lived. She said "I cannot take care of you", and called the authorities. It was late in the evening, and those children were placed in the city jail in Waco, TX until someone could come and take them back to the orphanage the next day. I always harbored a secret hate for that woman just for that one incident, but kept it to myself. I would have lived in a tent to keep my children near me. Maybe she was wiser, because they all wound up getting an education and making something of themselves.....and that care and education was provided by the state of Texas. [/*]

My parents were foster parents in Texas. My mother was a volunteer for the CPS. Some of the kids placed with them had come from homes where they were beaten, sexually abused, and essentially thrown away. When the kids first came to the home, they were scared and didn't understand why they were taken from their parents. Within days, they began to understand because they saw and felt love from my parents. They did not want to go back to the abusive environment from which they were taken.

Up until my parents died, many of these kids continued to stay in touch. My parents were the only parental love these kids ever received.

[lotty]

Originally posted by spageddy [*]We usually only hear about the rotten foster parents. There are lots more wonderful foster parents than there are rotten ones. (JMO)In any case, I think that the care of these particular children will be closely monitored. Again, JMO, but one would surmise that with all the media attention focused on this case, that the state would be very careful with how these children are cared for. [/*]

Great post!
There are many foster parents out there doing an amazing job, silent, strong, loving and patient. There are more foster families than most people can imagine. The unsung heroes of our children. You don't hear about the "good ones" because they are doing their jobs, which aren't jobs, it's a lifestyle, a very caring one.

[evalles]

Originally posted by stptheracket [*]Okay I have sat and read some of you post about the big bad foster care folks. I am a foster parent and a mother of two children adopted out of child protective services. CPS worked with the mother, bent over backwards to try to get her to understand that she had to Take care of her kids. People that loose their kids to CPS always want to make it sound like it was not their fault, cps was picking on them or the kid was some how at fault. I never had a child in my care that was not 100% safer with me than with their parent. So if you had a bad experience then I am sorry for you. But don't blame the people that step up and take care of the children that their own flesh and blood can not or will not protect. [/*]

Yeah, like that foster dad of Dominic James who was taken from his parents for smoking pot and given to John Dilley who beat him to death.

Or Rilya Wilson who had been missing from her foster care home for 15 months before state officials knew she was go
ne. She is now presumed dead.

Or a 3-year-old foster boy in Chicago that was found chained by the neck to his bedpost in a drug raid in January. The foster parents were charged with child endangerment.

This is just a few. So while I have no doubt there are wonderful foster families, this is all the proof I need to know that some foster parents are worse than the parents.

And , could social svcs have done more to prevent these brothers from being killed ?
http://www.pe.com/localnews/coronaar...01.ed675f.html


I know there are bad parents as well as bad foster parents and bad social workers, they're called bad human beings.
While their jobs are difficult, there are times when they leave kids with parents when it's obvious that they shouldn't and at the same time, they'll remove a child because the house is dirty. What happens if a child removed from a dirty house goes to a bad foster parent ?
Jon Phillips and Sarah Berry were foster parents who starved a beautiful 7 year od boy to death.
I'm sure everyone remembers Marcus Fiesel and his wonderful foster parents.

With stories like this, how does a mother with a dirty house or who got in a fight with her husband feel when her kids are placed with someone chosen by the state ?

This is all the proof I need to know that the state doesn't always err on the side of the child.

[evalles]

Originally posted by Texanne [*]I have a little boy living here that is being raised as a grandson right along with my other grandsons. I fully appreciate what foster parents are doing. I just have a fear of ever allowing this child to be "in the system". I made a deal with his mother to give me custody. I do not receive any funds, nor claim him on my taxes. That was part of the deal. We do it because he is "one of us". It is working out fine. He spends time about once a month with his mother. You know who is lucky? We are! This kid is wonderful. [/*]

You are blessed. Congratulations.

Originally posted by evalles [*]
*snipped for brevity*

This is all the proof I need to know that the state doesn't always err on the side of the child. [/*]

I certainly agree that some foster parents are bad news, there's ample evidence of that. What we DON'T have is CNN reporting the thousands (millions?) of positive foster family situations in the country. Nobody cares if things go smoothly, it's not news when a troubled kid gets himself turned around with a new family and graduates high school. We only see the tragic cases.

[KatyDid]

I think the point was made that it is unfortunate the foster care stories we hear about are the ones that are bad. Something bad happens in every system ever created. I am glad to see the good stories posted here. I am sure they far out number the bad ones.

What is important is to measure the total efficacy of the system. If the good out ways the bad by a large margin, then there is an overall benefit.

We can hope the bad stories we hear about will bring a desired change to the facilities that erred in their judgment.

[Details]

Originally posted by evalles [*]...This is all the proof I need to know that the state doesn't always err on the side of the child. [/*]

OMG! You didn't know before this that the state was not perfect????


Wow.



Just wow...




I thought that would be something obvious. No human organization is perfect. Every last one will make some mistakes. You list all the mistakes and ignore all the successes, and they'll look horrible. List all the successes and ignore the mistakes and they'll look like gods.

Foster care is normally good, and saves huge numbers of children from horrible lives, exposes some of them for the first time to a healthy living environment. Once in awhile, a foster care home is bad. Once in awhile. Once in awhile a parent is bad. That's the normal situation in the world. Nothing is perfect. You can find mistakes made by Mother Theresa, the Pope, and Stephen Hawking; by Red Cross, Blood Banks - any person, any organization can and will make mistakes.

[evalles]

Originally posted by Details [*]OMG! You didn't know before this that the state was not perfect????


Wow.



Just wow...




I thought that would be something obvious. No human organization is perfect. Every last one will make some mistakes. You list all the mistakes and ignore all the successes, and they'll look horrible. List all the successes and ignore the mistakes and they'll look like gods.

Foster care is normally good, and saves huge numbers of children from horrible lives, exposes some of them for the first time to a healthy living environment. Once in awhile, a foster care home is bad. Once in awhile. Once in awhile a parent is bad. That's the normal situation in the world. Nothing is perfect. You can find mistakes made by Mother Theresa, the Pope, and Stephen Hawking; by Red Cross, Blood Banks - any person, any organization can and will make mistakes. [/*]

OMG! You didn't know before this that the state was not perfect????
________________________________________________
No clue. If you can't trust your own government, who can you trust.

[Details]

Originally posted by evalles [*]OMG! You didn't know before this that the state was not perfect????
________________________________________________
No clue. If you can't trust your own government, who can you trust. [/*]

I knew, and I posted as such. Government makes mistakes. If that is a shock, if individual mistakes to you mean that we ignore the alternatives for these children - I'm sorry for you. Yes - they'll make mistakes. Anyone does. Look at any charity, the best intentioned, the best run in the world - and you'll find mistakes they've made. Look at the most amazingly good person in the world, and you can find a litany of bad things they've done (especially when you listen only to one side).


None of this changes the facts. The kids are in an abusive environment. CPS is removing them from this abusive environment and sending them to foster care homes. CPS uses all the care they can to be sure these homes are good. Some few slip through, sometimes CPS hires a bad employee or a few. But they are trying to protect the children, FLDS is trying to abuse the children. The difference is clear. As many testimonials show - none of which, BTW, make the news - there are plenty of good and great foster homes, doing an amazing job helping children. The few times they don't, it makes national news. But just in this small pool of people, we've got a bunch of stories to outweigh those of good outcomes.

[evalles]

Originally posted by Rainkiss [*]

I certainly agree that some foster parents are bad news, there's ample evidence of that. What we DON'T have is CNN reporting the thousands (millions?) of positive foster family situations in the country. Nobody cares if things go smoothly, it's not news when a troubled kid gets himself turned around with a new family and graduates high school. We only see the tragic cases. [/*]

That's what sells newspapers

[Details]

Originally posted by evalles [*]That's what sells newspapers [/*]

Yep. But it's not statistically relevant. Just for the first date I found data, on Sept 30, 2001, there were 542,000 children in foster care. Half a million. The reports you find in the media are an incredibly small percentage of that - and are spread out over time. That's how good the foster care system is. Find me 5,000 bad foster home cases that happened in 2001, and you'll still be saying that 99% of all foster homes are good. Of course, the articles and quips you've posted, from over several years, are what - 10? 20? out of 542,000 in one year, who knows how many more in the rest of the years you use to sample articles, to find the rare abuse story.

Of course, some of those children go in and out - they go to foster care for a few days or months while their parents get straightened out. According to this, the number abused or neglected per year is nearly double:

According to Child Maltreatment 2006, the most recent report of data from the National Child Abuse and Neglect Data System (NCANDS), approximately 905,000 children were found to be victims of child abuse or neglect in calendar year 2006. Of this number, 64.1 percent suffered neglect, 16 percent were physically abused, 8.8 percent were sexually abused, 6.6 percent were emotionally or psychologically maltreated, and 2.2 percent were medically neglected. In addition, 15.1 percent of victims experienced "other" types of maltreatment such as "abandonment," "threats of harm to the child," and "congenital drug addiction."

http://cc.msnscache.com/cache.aspx?q...d9d&FORM=CVRE2
http://faq.acf.hhs.gov/cgi-bin/acfri...YWdlPTE*&p_li=

I wonder how the statistics would compare between situations between children with natural parents and children with foster parents.

[Details]

Originally posted by Rainkiss [*]I wonder how the statistics would compare between situations between children with natural parents and children with foster parents. [/*]

Well - there was the recent news that 1 in 50 infants is abused or neglected - and that report made it clear they were not talking about just first time parent mistakes, but true abuse and neglect - and just in the first year of life.

Originally posted by Details [*]Well - there was the recent news that 1 in 50 infants is abused or neglected - and that report made it clear they were not talking about just first time parent mistakes, but true abuse and neglect - and just in the first year of life. [/*]

I'm speechless... I suppose I shouldn't be shocked, but I am. And that's reported cases, with no social worker keeping an eye on every case, like they (hypothetically) do with foster kids.

That's just not right.

[evalles]

Originally posted by Rainkiss [*]

I'm speechless... I suppose I shouldn't be shocked, but I am. And that's reported cases, with no social worker keeping an eye on every case, like they (hypothetically) do with foster kids.

That's just not right. [/*]

I'd have to see the study.

This could be out of 50 abuse allegations, 1 is substantiated.

If not, what are they doing, going door to door asking people if they're abusing their infants ?

[Details]

Originally posted by Aame [*]So scary that so many become even more victimized in foster care. [/*]

Some few are - but many more than that few STOP being victimized due to foster care. Half a million kids in foster care, and for nearly all of them, their time in foster care is when the abuse and neglect stops.

It's sad that some foster homes are bad, some CPS don't oversee enough, etc. - and it needs to be fixed. But we need to remember - half a million kids. Any report we see - that's one kid, one failure, out of half a million. If there are problems with 5000 kids in a year, then that's a 1% failure rate - for kids that have come almost entirely from abusive and neglectful homes - so for the other 99%, they have gone from bad to good, for 1%, they went from bad to worse.


We always have to work to improve - but to forget the success rate means we may throw the baby out with the bathwater, make a change to fix 1% that breaks the 99% case.

[Details]

Here's the study:
http://abcnews.go.com/Health/MindMoo...ory?id=4582335

[evalles]

Originally posted by Details [*]Here's the study:
http://abcnews.go.com/Health/MindMoo...ory?id=4582335 [/*]

I'm at work - I can't check the numbers, 1 in 50 is 20 out of 1000 reported cases.68.5% were neglected or 13 out of 1000. Neglect ranges from the mother testing positive for drugs *4 leaving w/ ths baby to a mother being homeless. In 7 out of 1000 there was some kind of physical abuse.

[Freebird]

Originally posted by evalles [*]

Yeah, like that foster dad of Dominic James who was taken from his parents for smoking pot and given to John Dilley who beat him to death.

Or Rilya Wilson who had been missing from her foster care home for 15 months before state officials knew she was go
ne. She is now presumed dead.

Or a 3-year-old foster boy in Chicago that was found chained by the neck to his bedpost in a drug raid in January. The foster parents were charged with child endangerment.

This is just a few. So while I have no doubt there are wonderful foster families, this is all the proof I need to know that some foster parents are worse than the parents.

And , could social svcs have done more to prevent these brothers from being killed ?
http://www.pe.com/localnews/coronaar...01.ed675f.html


I know there are bad parents as well as bad foster parents and bad social workers, they're called bad human beings.
While their jobs are difficult, there are times when they leave kids with parents when it's obvious that they shouldn't and at the same time, they'll remove a child because the house is dirty. What happens if a child removed from a dirty house goes to a bad foster parent ?
Jon Phillips and Sarah Berry were foster parents who starved a beautiful 7 year od boy to death.
I'm sure everyone remembers Marcus Fiesel and his wonderful foster parents.

With stories like this, how does a mother with a dirty house or who got in a fight with her husband feel when her kids are placed with someone chosen by the state ?

This is all the proof I need to know that the state doesn't always err on the side of the child. [/*]

Or the couple that kept their foster kids locked in cages.The FLDS kids may have had to work,but at least they were not locked in cages like animals.

[Freebird]

Originally posted by Rainkiss [*]

I certainly agree that some foster parents are bad news, there's ample evidence of that. What we DON'T have is CNN reporting the thousands (millions?) of positive foster family situations in the country. Nobody cares if things go smoothly, it's not news when a troubled kid gets himself turned around with a new family and graduates high school. We only see the tragic cases. [/*]

And what's the alternative? Sweep foster care abuse under the rug when it happens? Seems like some here want to do that.Why should alleged abuse in FLDS get more attention then child abuse anywhere else? I think foster care abuse is more serious since kids are put in foster care for their protection.

Is it a thought or theory that foster care is bad for children, or is it that some who take the job to be able to place children in foster care are bad. You do get burned out, but some stay for the pay check and insurance. It is a very hard job trying to place children when they should be able to stay with their own family. But under no no circumstance should you leave a child where there is abuse of any kind. So if you have a few that are bad should that rule out the ones that are good and doing there job? I think after this raid in TX that the whole US is watching and everyone will be working to their best ability to do what is right for the children. I will have hope for the children.

[evalles]

[quote]Originally posted by dsmith [*]Is it a thought or theory that foster care is bad for children, or is it that some who take the job to be able to place children in foster care are bad. You do get burned out, but some stay for the pay check and insurance. It is a very hard job trying to place children when they should be able to stay with their own family. But under no no circumstance should you leave a child where there is abuse of any kind. So if you have a few that are bad should that rule out the ones that are good and doing there job? I think after this raid in TX that the whole US is watching and everyone will be working to their best ability to do what is right for the children. I will have hope for the children. [/*][/QU

I agree that with all the publicity, they're going to be careful with these children right now.
What happens when they're forgotten ?

[evalles]

Originally posted by Freebird [*]

And what's the alternative? Sweep foster care abuse under the rug when it happens? Seems like some here want to do that.Why should alleged abuse in FLDS get more attention then child abuse anywhere else? I think foster care abuse is more serious since kids are put in foster care for their protection. [/*]

Good point.

[Carol25]

Originally posted by Freebird [*]

Or the couple that kept their foster kids locked in cages.The FLDS kids may have had to work,but at least they were not locked in cages like animals. [/*]

Remember those women who have been interviewed? How robotic they were? That doesn't happen overnight. This is what happened to them and to the children now...

FROM THE INSIDE OUT

http://home.mchsi.com/~ftio/mc-trauma-bonding.htm

Never heard about cages. But we've heard about being locked in closets for very long periods of time and the little ones put underwater faucets until the stop crying...

[Shells2]

I hate the bad rap foster parents get. Yes there are some bad ones, just like there are bad teachers, cops, judges etc.. There are always some bad apples in every profession.

Many many foster parents give up thier own lives to take care of kids who just need some love and safety - these foster parents make a difference in kids lives and they go on to have better lives because of these people, not in spite of them.

So enough with the "these kids are better with thier parents than in foster care" sentiments. I hardly think the millions of kids that foster care has helped is as newsworthy as the horror stories that make it to the 11:00oclock segment..

These kids were in danger. This lifestyle is not healthy and nobody deserves to be raised like that. They deserve a chance and thank goodness Texas is fighting to make that happen!

[evalles]

I'm glad this board was started.

I want to share a few clips from an e-mail a friend of mine sent to a group we both belong to.
__________________________________________________ __
We'd better start being as eager to do due diligence on FLDS as we are CPS. CPS is a dangerous cult. FLDS is a dangerous cult. We don't fight one cult by defending another.

I challenge each of us to understand the facts about FLDS before we continue this fight in its defense:

Polygamy: It is comfortable and satisfying for us to fight for the parents of FLDS as long as we continue to identify FLDS as a polygamous sect. All we have to say is, Hey, I don't believe in polygamy, but those kids are healthy and happy, and not abused, and the young women can leave anytime they want to, so we should let the sect practice their own religious beliefs however they see fit.

But FLDS does not practice polygamy. Not even close. Polygamy is plural marriage between consenting adults. That's it. Plural marriage between consenting adults. Continuing to refer to FLDS as a polygamous sect is like referring to a gang of drug dealers as a group of unlicensed pharmacists. Any of us interested in the actual truth of the matter will stop calling FLDS a polygamist sect. It is not. Indeed, there are practicing polygamists all over the world, but FLDS is not a group of polygamists.

I'll say it again: CPS is a dangerous cult. FLDS is a dangerous cult. And we don't fight one cult by defending another.

I'm not going to post my friend's name to protect her privacy.
She's a very smart woman. Her grandaughter was taken from her after she made an attorney at CPS mad. Despite all the excellent home studies and the fact that her grandaughter was thriving. Her case was moved from the office where she was given glowing reports for over two years by all the workers to an office in the same county that seemed terribly biased against her.
This little girl was four years old and even though she'd never spent so much as a day at this man's home, she was given to one of her drug addicted mother's ex-boyfriends so that she could be with 2 of her siblings. There were 10 children living with this man and his new wife and two of her older boys had been in trouble for molestation. But she made the wrong person mad. She tells me that there were some wonderful workers that did what they could, but they were removed from the case and it was given to someone that hadn't developed a bond with her and this little girl, that weren't willing to tear apart this family. The new workers were easier for this one bad agent for the court to manipulate. My friend had already petitioned to adopt her, and all the reports up to that point recommended her being allowed to adopt this little girl that she had lived for for over 2 years.
The ex-bfrnd of the childs mother was inconvenienced by the visitation between his two sons and their sister that the grandmother insisted take place and also petitioned for adoption. Her court date was before his, but the attorney for CPS moved the court date ahead of hers. She knew something was wrong when she dropped her off at pre-school by the way the staff was acting. She called CPS and the worker confirmed her fears. They told her they were on the way to pick the little girl up, but they were lost and wanted directions.They were actually parked a couple houses up, she doesn't know why, but thinks maybe they were trying to see if she'd try to pick her grndghter up 1st. She walked up to the car and asked if she could go with them to say goodbye. They allowed this and they followed her to the school. The little girl was obviously upset, so she explained that before her brothers had come to visit her and now she was going to stay with them and they were going to come visit grandma. There was a lot more, but basically she put her own hurts aside to comfort her grandchild who she never saw or was allowed to talk to again. After someone grove off w/ her life, the worker who she feels conspired against her to take this child away then says to her
" I've never been so proud of anybody in my life. That was beautiful. Can I hug you ?"
She looked at her through her tears and told her NO !!

[KatyDid]

So is she saying none of those women are consenting adults, not even those that marry when they are into their 20's?

[Carol25]

[quote]Originally posted by evalles [*]I'm glad this board was started.

I want to share a few clips from an e-mail a friend of mine sent to a group we both belong to.
__________________________________________________ __
We'd better start being as eager to do due diligence on FLDS as we are CPS. CPS is a dangerous cult. FLDS is a dangerous cult. We don't fight one cult by defending another.

I challenge each of us to understand the facts about FLDS before we continue this fight in its defense:

Polygamy: It is comfortable and satisfying for us to fight for the parents of FLDS as long as we continue to identify FLDS as a polygamous sect. All we have to say is, Hey, I don't believe in polygamy, but those kids are healthy and happy, and not abused, and the young women can leave anytime they want to, so we should let the sect practice their own religious beliefs however they see fit.

But FLDS does not practice polygamy. Not even close. Polygamy is plural marriage between consenting adults. That's it. Plural marriage between consenting adults. Continuing to refer to FLDS as a polygamous sect is like referring to a gang of drug dealers as a group of unlicensed pharmacists. Any of us interested in the actual truth of the matter will stop calling FLDS a polygamist sect. It is not. Indeed, there are practicing polygamists all over the world, but FLDS is not a group of polygamists.

I'll say it again: CPS is a dangerous cult. QUOTE]

Evalles, your friend has a big problem. If she considers CPS a cult and the FLDS does not practice polygamy, I certainly question her account of the events of her experience with CPS.
You can't question one without questioning the other.

[Carol25]

Originally posted by Shells2 [*]I hate the bad rap foster parents get. Yes there are some bad ones, just like there are bad teachers, cops, judges etc.. There are always some bad apples in every profession.

Many many foster parents give up thier own lives to take care of kids who just need some love and safety - these foster parents make a difference in kids lives and they go on to have better lives because of these people, not in spite of them.

So enough with the "these kids are better with thier parents than in foster care" sentiments. I hardly think the millions of kids that foster care has helped is as newsworthy as the horror stories that make it to the 11:00oclock segment..

These kids were in danger. This lifestyle is not healthy and nobody deserves to be raised like that. They deserve a chance and thank goodness Texas is fighting to make that happen! [/*]

Thank God we have the services of CPS. My complaint is sometimes they don't follow up on investigations where children have been so seriously harmed or died. We need more investigators.

[Details]

Scary, scary people. CPS is no cult, the FLDS obviously is. To be so willing as that person to overlook molested children is pretty scary. Seems some want to destroy a system with a high percentage success rate just because that rate is not 100%, while leaving kids in a system where the abuse rate is awfully close to 100%.


You don't ignore problems, even when most foster homes do a great job. But you don't ignore success either. You work on fixing the problems. Which is exactly what happens every time a problem crops up. But in most cases, the foster home is good. In most cases, CPS is acting appropriately. From every stat posted, every story, in a huge majority of the cases, this is true. Half a million kids in foster care, compared to a handful of abuse cases. The abuse cases need to be fixed, but you look at half a million kids with their parents, and I suspect you'll see more abuse.

[Annie143]

I think a lot of people get into foster care for the money. I know of at least 3 foster families that did just that. Having said that, one family took disabled children and seemed to do a good job with them. The other two, I am not too certain about. Any abuse of a child is one case too many.

One family here in central Fla took in foster children and it came out that the male in the house was abusing the girls.

I think there is very much room for abuse and the reasons for fostering children is many times for financial reasons. But, I am sure and certain that there are good foster families and God Bless them, I sincerely mean that.

Yes, I remember the case with the children being locked in cages. Ohio, I think.

this is a very sad situation and there is no good solution.

[evalles]

[quote]Originally posted by Carol25 [*]

Originally posted by evalles [*]I'm glad this board was started.

I want to share a few clips from an e-mail a friend of mine sent to a group we both belong to.
__________________________________________________ __
We'd better start being as eager to do due diligence on FLDS as we are CPS. CPS is a dangerous cult. FLDS is a dangerous cult. We don't fight one cult by defending another.

I challenge each of us to understand the facts about FLDS before we continue this fight in its defense:

Polygamy: It is comfortable and satisfying for us to fight for the parents of FLDS as long as we continue to identify FLDS as a polygamous sect. All we have to say is, Hey, I don't believe in polygamy, but those kids are healthy and happy, and not abused, and the young women can leave anytime they want to, so we should let the sect practice their own religious beliefs however they see fit.

But FLDS does not practice polygamy. Not even close. Polygamy is plural marriage between consenting adults. That's it. Plural marriage between consenting adults. Continuing to refer to FLDS as a polygamous sect is like referring to a gang of drug dealers as a group of unlicensed pharmacists. Any of us interested in the actual truth of the matter will stop calling FLDS a polygamist sect. It is not. Indeed, there are practicing polygamists all over the world, but FLDS is not a group of polygamists.

I'll say it again: CPS is a dangerous cult. QUOTE]

Evalles, your friend has a big problem. If she considers CPS a cult and the FLDS does not practice polygamy, I certainly question her account of the events of her experience with CPS.
You can't question one without questioning the other. [/*]

No, she's using it to get her point across, not in the typical sense of the word. She means they're worse than polygamists. Do you also want to question the fact that she thinks they're rapists and shouldn't be defended. She thinks that true polygamists have more than one wife,but that they're consenting adults not adults having sex with teenagers under the guise of religion.
She's telling everyone in the parent support group that they shouldn't support FLDS. So, if you doubt her comments, you should doubt that the FLDS are scum as far as she's concerned.
As for what happened to her w/ CPS, doubt it if you want, she lives 3 miles from me and I've seen all the documentation.
It's hard to believe because you can't imagine it happening. Neither could I a short year ago. I thought that anyone accused by the almighty child savers must be guilty, that they don't take children for no reason. The good ones don't, but they're not all good and they're in very powerful positions. My case only involved my 16 year old, my 6 & 7 year old were home the entire time,but this took its toll on our entire family. I live in a great neighborhood (my state rep and mayor live in my neighborhood)where I moved because it has awesome schools and is entirely kid oriented. Because of my incredibly big mouth, my neighbors/friends are all aware of what happened. A stay at home mom across the street was afraid to take her daughter to be tested for ADD because someone told her if she didn't agree to give her daughter ADD drugs they could charge her w/ medical neglect.
My daughter told me that the CPS worker told her aunt that she could let her spend the weekend with her boyfriend if she wanted. It was ok for her to work til midnight or 1AM while she was flunking all her classes.
This was not acceptable at my house.
She even discussed with my child, that I was causing her alot of trouble and they'd pulled her file 3 times. My state rep had something to do with this. I had to stand back while choices I felt were harmful to my child were made at every turn. Since her uncle has had several DWI's and is a persistent offender, I had to worry that he would get in an accident with my child. Since all their children do drugs (they sell and so does one of their sons) I was worried that my kid would become a drug addict.
This is what parents with children in foster care have to worry about all the time. Who has my child, are they taking care of them and are they safe ? Is the foster dad a perv ?
If the foster parent is ok, what about their family members or visitors to their home.
Yes I'm sure there are parents that could care less, and they'll probably be the ones to get their kids back.
Their criminal records can all be accessed by our county website. They were not allowed custody of the father's biological child and if wasn't against the rules, I'd post a link to the Tenn family court case(made case law because they awarded her to the grandparents and not the bio dad) in which he perjured himself on the stand, and tested positive for drugs during the course of the trial. The worker on the case has no children of her own and I'm a 37 year old mother of 3 with no crim record, no CPS history, a stable job, a nice home in a nice neighborhood and had purposely lived away from these family members for most of my adult life.
At this point, I consider it a learning experience. I actually trusted my govenment before this happened.

[evalles]

Originally posted by Shells2 [*]I hate the bad rap foster parents get. Yes there are some bad ones, just like there are bad teachers, cops, judges etc.. There are always some bad apples in every profession.

Many many foster parents give up thier own lives to take care of kids who just need some love and safety - these foster parents make a difference in kids lives and they go on to have better lives because of these people, not in spite of them.

So enough with the "these kids are better with thier parents than in foster care" sentiments. I hardly think the millions of kids that foster care has helped is as newsworthy as the horror stories that make it to the 11:00oclock segment..

These kids were in danger. This lifestyle is not healthy and nobody deserves to be raised like that. They deserve a chance and thank goodness Texas is fighting to make that happen! [/*]

You're right, it's not as noteworthy. There are thousands of children that have been abused or killed in foster care.
They matter. Marcus Feisel matters, Rilya Wilson matters, so does Dominic James. His mom buiried her son, beaten to death by his foster father. He was removed because his mom and dad got in a fight with each other and smoked pot. Was he better off dead than with them. He was 2 years old and a grown man beat him to death. As she was looking down at his broken and bruised little dead body, do you think she was thinking about all the thousands of kids in wonderful foster homes. No, she was wondering how someone that was supposed to protect her child could hand him over to a monster.